The Cheyene Response

The Cheyenne Response

by Dennis J. Oetting

http://www.amazon.com/The-Cheyenne-Response-ebook/dp/B004AYDC7A/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1343281390&sr=1-1&keywords=the+cheyenne+response

Plot

When a doctor diagnoses Nick Silverforb with pancreatic cancer, he feels his life has no meaning. In order to make a difference in the world, he decides to sacrifice his life in order to kill terrorists. Soon after, though, the report comes in that the doctor had read the wrong report and Nick is fine.

The idea, however, of retribution never completely leaves his mind and when Nick’s fiance is killed in a New York City bombing, he creates The Cheyenne Response. Terminally ill people who have been affected by terrorists are encouraged to seek out Nick and his organization and, like Nick once wanted to do, make a difference by eliminating fanatical Muslim threats.

The premise is unique. I thought there could be some suspenseful moments with the various adventures and missions.

Characters

Nico ‘Nick’ Moshe Enzio Silverforb: 41, physically fit, Israeli by birth by parents of different nationalities. Military and Mossad experience. Combat experience. Attended KansasState. Has degrees in electrical engineering and computer science. MBA from university of Kansas. Not close to his divorced parents. Speaks several languages. Owns a consulting firm.

E.J. Holub Kennelley: Involved in advertising. Has lived in various countries due to a father in the military. Runner. Has a sister.

Nick is the main character, but Oetting brings in a plethora of other characters, specifically those seeking out The Cheyenne Response. There is plenty of information, maybe too much background information, on many characters. Too much detail, not enough adventure. Some of the actions of the characters aren’t believable. For instance, Nick and his prospective in-laws fly to New York after the bombing, make a few inquiries, then fly back home immediately upon finding nothing. I would think loved ones would stick around and demand information, determined not to leave until they are told something. Everybody sort of knows the girl is dead, but it is never confirmed and there is no mention of evidence afterward.

Dialogue

E.J. has the most distinctive voice but many characters sound the same. Conversations are not exciting with standard lines and cliches.

Writing

Oetting graduated with honors from the Patterson school of short chapters. Lol. One or two instances of unnecessary profanity. Several misspellings and punctuation errors. The main problem I had with this story was there was too much build up for no action. As I said above, the premise spurred anticipation for action and danger and intrigue. We see several cases of new characters introduced, lengthy backgrounds, their current predicament with a terminal illness, and their subsequent involvement with Nick. Plans are made for retribution and every single time, the bad guys die in the cleanest and smoothest operations I’ve read about. I wanted danger. I wanted threats and gunfire and maybe a failure. One particular scene involving a kidnapping. The rescue went off without a hitch. Never have any rescues happened without something going wrong. I wanted more suspense and tension. I wanted more detail on the execution of the missions and less about who the people were. Nick was only involved in the initial stages but never in the actual operations themselves. With his experience, he could have accompanied these people and been in on the danger.

My ranking:

Yellow Belt

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Posted on July 31, 2012, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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